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For the first time, I miss the old me.

I hate how I have become. I hate where my mind is going.

I'm just so talented being in denial that I didn't see this coming.

I miss those questions.

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Now I know he feels in that monstrous way.

I feel terrible.

I twitch. And I flinch. I'll walk left if I have to.

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I...

Never mind.

I just miss it. I can't feel it.

I see you and there's nothing there.

I just miss the feeling.

I miss the feeling of being loved.

I miss the feeling of loving someone.

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I don't want anyone cause I don't feel for anyone. What I do feel (or miss) is the warmth and arms.

I'm always just bad timing.

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I don't think they care. They just want to win.

I'm sick and tired. I'm sick and tired.



Without guilt, some people just want to die.

Without love, they do.
That just encourages them to do so.

They just don't care. They shove and shove and shove but they didn't.

Just remember, don't get attached to people. No lovers, no close friends. No dreams.

I swear I'm not suicidal, but dying right this minute seems nice.

All those hopes and dreams keep us going. But if we do fail... I don't know what I'd do.

When I have truly fail at my dream,

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I didn't like the memories.

I think I will go back to normal.

Seeing you is just too soon. Too soon.

I'd rather see you from a distance.

Ha. I remember this theory I had when I was a little kid when I people watched. If you can't see the entire me then you can't see me at all. I'd hide behind counters and bushes. That was fun.

This isn't fun. Not even close.

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I feel so oddly lonely.

I don't like it.

And I also can't believe it's making me kind of... negative.

It makes me want... ugh, love...

?!